My stupid smellcheck stopped working.
The winner of the coveted corncob signifying a championship at the Batt Cave’s Annual Smelling Bee.
Some improvised jazz singing was performed by a Gray Catbird.
Some improvised jazz singing was performed by a Gray Catbird.
The male Brown-headed Cowbird does a little song and dance.
The Lincoln’s Sparrow is named after Thomas Lincoln, who shot one for John James Audubon to paint.
The handsome Rose-breasted Grosbeak was known by the rather unattractive moniker “cutthroat” when I was a lad.
The Indigo Bunting is a bird that is well worth staying home to see.
Mr. & Mrs. Brown Thrasher are trying to remember where they put whatever it was they were looking for.
I wish I could do the call of the Sandhill Crane. If and when I ever stand in a line again, it might help me jump to the head of the line.
A dandelion clock. The number of puffs needed to blow all the seeds away is supposed to indicate the time.
Orange you pretty, Scarlet Tanager.
Smooching cardinals.
Backlit but still beautiful Red-headed Woodpeckers.
The Orchard Oriole is smaller than a Baltimore Oriole just as an orchard is smaller than Baltimore.
Naturally
My walking took me to clouds and birdsongs. Birds were living out loud. I greeted birds as if they were old friends. An eastern towhee delighted me with its presence. I'm sorry
its name was changed from rufous-sided towhee. I named a faithful canine companion after this handsome bird. The dog didn't come when I called "Eastern," so I had to shift her name to Towhee.
A brown thrasher repeated itself just as mature men tend to do. I listened to its greatest hits. The plaintive whistling of white-throated sparrows was alluring.
I heard a loud, ringing "Pete, Pete, Pete, Pete, lend me your shoe" from the water's edge. The song of the northern waterthrush reminded me of the title of an Emily Dickinson poem, "A Little Madness in the Spring."
My attention was drawn to the Nashville warblers by their yellow undersides, but they foraged so low their rufous crown patches were often evident. A black-and-white warbler creeped along a tree trunk as deftly as a nuthatch. The first Harris's sparrow and rose-breasted grosbeak in the yard looked massive while maintaining social distancing from a chipping sparrow. I watched an industrious chickadee peel dead bark from a sapling for use in a nest. Elderberry leafed out. I saw squirrel nests high in oak trees. The squirrels are living in a grocery store.
A touch of nature is outside every window. I never get tired of the scenery found there. It's a snapshot in time. Just look around. It's show-and-tell for the sequestered.
I've been reading
I revisited "The Red Pony" by John Steinbeck where I found this passage, “On the fences the shiny blackbirds with red epaulets clicked their dry call. The meadowlarks sang like water, and the wild doves, concealed among the bursting leaves of the oaks, made a sound of restrained grieving.”
Q&A
Leann Juveland of Albert Lea asked if great horned owls have mate for life and how many eggs they have. Great horned owls are monogamous and a pair often remains on the same territory all year. Pairs may stay together for life. If something happens to one, the survivor usually finds another mate. In the fall, the pair begins a courtship display, loudly calling to each other. They have one to four eggs with a 30-37 day incubation period.
"Why should I feed birds in the summer if they have insects to eat?" The feeders bring birds where we can see them better. It's our own private Discovery Channel or National Geographic Channel that allows us to see hummingbirds and orioles at nectar feeders. Jelly feeders bring in gorgeous orioles, tanagers and catbirds. Sunflower seeds attract handsome rose-breasted grosbeaks. American goldfinches eat seeds almost exclusively. House finches eat almost solely plant materials, including seeds, buds and fruits. I love seeing a father cardinal introduce his offspring to a feeder. I keep our restaurant open year-round.
"What has webbed feet other than ducks and geese?" Other animals include: Swan, gull, loon, alcid (birds like puffins), albatross, tern, flamingo, some penguin species, beaver, muskrat, and some kinds of frogs, salamanders and turtles.
"Are juvenile bald eagles larger than their parents?" Not, really, but they might look larger their first year because of longer flight feathers that aid fledglings learning to fly.
"Where do white-throated sparrows nest in Minnesota?" In north central and northeastern Minnesota, with the highest nesting densities in the northeastern parts.
"Where do golden eagles build their nests?" Golden eagles usually nest on cliffs or in trees in open habitat. They avoid heavily forested and developed areas but have been observed nesting on manmade structures like windmills. Bald eagles typically nest high in the tallest living tree. Golden eagles don't nest in Minnesota.
"My grandfather told me that robins sing before a rain. Is that true?" When robins are intent on singing, they begin early in the morning and sing before almost everything. I believe robins often sing before a rain, a rain song of sorts filled with liquid phrases, perhaps responding to changes in barometric pressure or for some other reason.
Thanks for stopping by
"Some things in life are bad. They can really make you mad. Other things just make you swear and curse. When you're chewing on life's gristle. Don't grumble, give a whistle. And this'll help things turn out for the best. And always look on the bright side of life. Always look on the light side of life. If life seems jolly rotten. There's something you've forgotten. And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing. When you're feeling in the dumps. Don't be silly chumps. Just purse your lips and whistle, that's the thing. And always look on the bright side of life. Come on! Always look on the right side of life." —Eric Idle/Monty Python
Do good.
© Al Batt 2020
A Red-bellied Woodpecker showing some red. Photo by Al Batt
W.C. Fields would have said, “My little chickadee.”
My father called Indigo Buntings blue canaries.
The Brown Thrasher repeats itself like a good radish.
A black-and-white bird with a red bandana equals a Rose-breasted Grosbeak.
The Ruby-crowned Kinglet is a little bird with a giant voice.
A Nashville Warbler, like most Nashville Warblers, is not in Nashville.
Last year’s Baltimore Oriole nest.
A gray squirrel works hard to pluck the sunflower seeds from the red milo.
The Great Blue Heron is incapable of biting off more than it could chew, but it does try to eat more than it can swallow.
The season has been canceled due to COVID-19. I’ll miss being aboard.
Duct tape saved this feeder so a Red-headed Woodpecker could use it.
A black-winged redbird — the Scarlet Tanager.
A disabled lawn mower led to a lawn blooming in violets and Common Yellowthroats. A great improvement over the grass.
A Common Yellowthroat is uncommonly handsome. And it’s wearing a mask!
It was my honor and great pleasure to be a speaker, tour guide, workshop instructor and auctioneer at Bluebirds Across Nebraska’s wonderful whoop-dee-do before the virus really hit the fan.
A pair of Brown Thrashers after failing to get under the limbo stick.
I hung out with some other drips this morning.
A Pileated Woodpecker has been as busy as a tall beaver.
Bobby Vinton almost sang, “She wore blue violets. Bluer than violets were her eyes. Warmer than May her tender sighs.”
Today an Orchard Oriole and cheap grape jelly made for the greatest combination since the Lewis & Clark expedition. That was the one featuring Jerry Lewis and Dick Clark.
On a tombstone at St. Aidan.
The Red-bellied Woodpecker is a good look for her.
There was a great gold strike in the yard today.
Naturally
Bird feeding softens the edges of isolation. It lowers blood pressure. Birds offer needed touches of life and feeders act as prisms. Shine a light through one and it radiates countless directions. The blue jays cried, "Hey, hey, hey!" I listened to them and tossed them some peanuts. I watched a red-tailed hawk work a thermal to ease its flight. Common grackles made sounds like rusty gates. Fox sparrows ripped up the dance floor of my yard with their chicken scratching. They brought joy to one deep in self-care.
This and data
Some information gleaned from a Pheasants Forever publication. Producing one migratory monarch butterfly requires 29 milkweed plants since the butterflies have a survival rate of 1-2%. There are 76 (Monarch Watch says 73) native milkweed species in the U.S. During WWII, school children helped the war effort by collecting 1.5 billion milkweed pods to fill life jackets. A little over a pound of the cotton-like milkweed floss could keep a soldier afloat over 40 hours.
Bird Watcher's Digest, a fine magazine, sent me my horoscope. It read: "Pisces is in tune with the magic of everyday existence. Affectionate, empathetic, wise, and soulful, you love nature and inspire people with the way you understand the rhythm of the seasons." I'm greatly flattered.
The late Charlie Ellis had a farm in Lacombe, Alberta, with many bluebird nestboxes. When Charlie held white feathers in his hand, tree swallows flew down and snatched them. Tree swallows build cup nests of dried vegetation, gathered and carried to the nest mostly by the females. Both mates bring feathers, preferably white, to line and to arch over the cup.
Turkey vultures prefer meat as fresh as possible and won't eat extremely rotted carcasses. They can smell carrion less than 12-24 hours old. Many of us have a 3-second or 5-second rule. Vultures have a 259,200-second rule.
Carrol Henderson, former director of the Nongame Wildlife Program of the DNR for 41 years, said that in 1929, the Minnesota Legislature removed legal protections from eagles, hawks, owls, and falcons, declaring them outlaw birds before eventually restoring the protections in 1948.
A friend, Gordon Hopp of Unadilla, Nebraska, received an award better than the leg lamp, the major award in the movie "Christmas Story," from the North American Bluebird Society. Gordon maintains 400 bluebird nestboxes and fledges 2000 bluebirds annually. He also provides boxes for American kestrels and wood ducks.
Bill Taddicken is the director of the Iain Nicolson Audubon Center at Rowe Sanctuary near Gibbon, Minden and Kearney, Nebraska. There have been 360 whooping cranes sighted at Rowe since it began in 1974. A whooping crane is white and 5-foot tall with a 7.5-foot wingspan and a sandhill crane is gray and 4-foot tall with a 6.5-foot wingspan. Each year, Bill gets reports of whooping cranes that turn out to be American white pelicans with 9-foot wingspans. Bill calls those reported birds "whooping pelicans." American white pelicans have traditionally migrated through Nebraska and were seen by Lewis and Clark during the Corp of Discovery's epic adventure. In August 1804, the expedition found a flock of several hundred white pelicans resting on a sandbar about two miles north of the mouth of Little Sioux River in present-day Burt or Thurston County, Nebraska, and Monona County, Iowa. A pelican was shot and measured by Captain Meriwether Lewis. Its throat pouch was determined to have held five gallons of water.
I've been reading
"Finding Beauty in a Broken World" by Terry Tempest Williams. She watched prairie dogs rise before the sun and stand with their paws pressed together as they faced the rising sun in total stillness for up to 30 minutes. Then she watched them at the end of the day make the same gesture 30 minutes before the sun went down. She used the term "prayer dogs" and wrote of clay‐colored monks dressed in discrete robes of fur standing as sentinels outside their burrows, watching as their communities disappear, one by one, their hands raised up in prayer. Navajo elders have said, “If you kill all the prairie dogs, there will be no one to cry for rain.”
Q&A
"Can you really stand an egg on end during the equinox?" Yes, but egg balancing can be done at any time with a steady hand, patience and the right egg.
"Shouldn't a hummingbird beat the eagles back here? They'd have less wind resistance." Good point, but there is that whole availability of food thing that a hummingbird must consider.
"Do birds down under fly upside down?" Only while calling, "Aussie! Aussie! Aussie! Oi! Oi! Oi!"
Thanks for stopping by
"One sees great things from the valley; only small things from the peak." — G.K. Chesterton
"In the spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours." — Mark Twain
Do good.
© Al Batt 2020
Let the Virginia Bluebells ring in Minnesota. Photo by Al Batt
My wife found a dead white-throated sparrow on the lawn. I didn’t know the bird, but I feel it’s a loss.
A Red Squirrel pulled up a stump and had a.bite to eat.
A Brown Thrasher with a little something on its bill.
I was happy to see this red admiral, but it wasn’t thrilled to have its picture taken.
Naturally
I listened to a delightful sparrow duet — song and vesper — as I watched a brown creeper creep brownly up trees. A yellow-rumped warbler fed on suet as a team of juncos raked the ground. The birding life is good.
I welcomed female red-winged blackbirds to the yard. The males arrive on their breeding grounds a few days to a few weeks before the females return. Females look like large sparrows, so often go unnoticed.
Meadow voles may breed throughout the year, but most commonly in spring and summer. Typically, they have two to five litters per year with a gestation period of 20-23 days. Litter sizes average 3 to 6. Due to high mortality, an average of only 2.6 offspring are successfully weaned. Young are weaned by the time they are 21 days old, and females are sexually mature in 35 to 40 days. Voles have short lifespans that generally range from 2 to 16 months. Voles are the potato chips of the prairie. If it weren't for all the predators eating them, we'd be overrun by voles.
I saw a red-headed woodpecker on a utility pole. Redheads were once so common that orchard owners paid bounties on them. Audubon reported that 100 were shot from a single cherry tree in one day in 1840. This bird has experienced a 70% decline in population from 1966 to 2014. A big factor in this drop is a lack of dead trees in open-forest habitats and urban areas. Adults have bright-red heads, white underparts and black backs with large white patches in the wings.
I saw a great horned owl at high noon, rousted from its roost by enraged crows. It’s a nocturnal hunter, but is also crepuscular, meaning it prefers to hunt at dusk and dawn. But it isn't opposed to grabbing a meal at any time of the day. What appears to be its ears are tufts of feathers called plumicorns. Great horned owls regularly eat skunks. Owls don't have a sense of smell keen enough to be offended by a skunk's smell. All they know is that a skunk is delicious. I took a great-horned owl to the Raptor Center at the University of Minnesota that had been hit by a car on the road. It had been skunk hunting and was successful in that regard. It was a real stinker. The trip to the Raptor Center in the company of a skunk owl was a long one.
Q&A
"When are fawns born?" Most fawns are born in May into early June after a gestation period of 190 to 210 days. A first-time mother usually has one fawn. Twins are common and triplets fairly common with experienced mothers. The weight of a fawn is 5 to 8 pounds at birth. For the first few weeks of their lives, fawns lie motionless on the ground when they're not nursing. I've heard all my life that fawns lack a scent. That's not completely true. It's not an overpowering odor. Predators sometimes stumble over a fawn, but they often find fawns by the smell of the baby deer. The spotted coats of fawns help hide them from predators. Fawns are precocial, meaning they are able to walk within hours after birth. Rainfall can be hard on fawns. If you find a fawn, its mother is usually nearby, even if you don’t see her.
"How long do deer live?" Most white-tailed deer live 2 to 3 years. The average lifespan for a wild white-tailed deer is 4.5 years (Lopez et al 2003). A tooth analysis on a doe shot by a hunter in Vermont in 2018 indicated it was 20.5 years old.
"How many litters does a rabbit have?" The eastern cottontail is prolific and has two to four litters of four to six young. A mother digs a shallow saucer-shaped nest in the ground and lines it with grass and fur from her belly. Baby cottontails leave the nest after three weeks. Only about 1% of rabbits make it to two years of age. A mother rabbit isn't a helicopter parent. To reduce predation, the mother rests and feeds nearby during the day, and returns to the nest at dawn and dusk to nurse her young.
Don Anderson of Albert Lea asked how to tell if thistle seed had gone bad. Nyjer seed has something wrong with it if the birds won’t eat it. The problem is mold or mildew if it smells musty. It's bad seed if it's clumped or slimy. Birds don’t eat the entire seed. They eat only the meat inside.
Thanks for stopping by
"The universe is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper." — Eden Phillpotts (often incorrectly credited to Yeats) "Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed." — Alexander Pope Do good.
© Al Batt 2020
This Indigo Bunting arrived early this year.
The White-throated Sparrow whistles while I work. I’m appreciative of his efforts.
He’s brown and he thrashes leaves. He’s a Brown Thrasher.
What does a Tree Swallow remember?
Naturally
"Drumroll, please," I said just loud enough for me to hear as I walked outside. Right on cue, a woodpecker hammered on a resonant branch. Every day brings new stories to the yard. I expect to see a queen bumblebee any day. She's the only one of her colony that survives winter.
Weather has been a rollercoaster ride without enough "whee" to it. I said "whee" as I walked. I understand why dogs are so excited about going for walks. I've been watching yellow-bellied sapsuckers maniacally machine gunning sap wells into trees. The work of those industrious birds has been followed closely by yellow-rumped warblers, diminutive ruby-crowned kinglets and both downy and hairy woodpeckers who gladly plundered the avian soda fountains. Those warblers, called butterbutts because of their yellow rumps, are proficient at flycatching, snapping prey out of the air.
Fox sparrows sang a song that made me want to move north with them. A silver hawk with a white rump patch flew low over the ground. It was a male northern harrier, once called a marsh hawk.
A caller reported a cacophony of birdsong in the morning. I appreciated his call, but disagreed with it being a cacophony. I think all birdsong is lovely, but I'm a strange bird. I'll admit some vocalizations of crows, gulls and others could be called a cacophony. I heard a cacophony of the strident voices of crows and jays as they mobbed an owl. The irate birds found strength in numbers.
I read that chipmunks have cheek pouches that when filled are three times bigger than their heads. I'm not sure that's correct, but they certainly look larger than rest of the head.
Wood ducks checked out tree cavities in the backyard. The female makes a loud "oo-eek, oo-eek" when disturbed and taking flight. The male has a thin, rising and falling zeeting whistle.
Turkey vultures wobbled overhead. Charles Darwin saw a vulture from the deck of the Beagle in 1835 and called it a "disgusting bird" whose bald head was "formed to wallow in putridity." That was harsh. They are beautiful birds. If it perceives a threat, a turkey vulture may play dead or project offensive smelling vomit as a defense. Vultures can't eat and run. They might be able to carry bits of food in their bills, but their feet are useless for carrying freight. In the ancient practice of Tibetan sky burial, a human corpse is placed on a mountaintop to be eaten by birds of prey, most commonly vultures. This tradition is a sustainable burial method symbolizing the impermanence of life for Buddhists.
I'm honored by each bird that visits my yard.
Q&A
Eric Annexstad wrote, "For the third year in a row we’re having a mid-April snowstorm. Any suggestions on what to feed the poor robins? We found several that perished last year." Cut up apples, oranges or pears. Raisins are good; blueberries and other berries work. Cranberries should be excellent, but my yard robins don’t seem to enjoy them. Softened dog food kibble, crumbled suet, sunflower hearts or mealworms. The problem is that most robins aren’t feeder birds. An easy way to help robins discover the fruit is to put it in a platform feeder or on the ground near a bird bath. They don’t always make a mad rush to the food. Good luck.
Roger Batt Algona asked how to preserve a bald-faced hornet nest. It isn't necessary to treat the nest in any way. The nest will persist if it's suspended in a dry location where it won't be damaged by handling or vibration.
"How many broods does a mourning dove have each year?" They have two or three in Minnesota, with as many as five or six broods in southern areas.
"Are predators the main reasons I'm not seeing as many pheasants as I once did?" Predators don't eat habitat. Loss of habitat is the main problem and weather frequently piles on.
"Would putting the driver's license photo of my husband on the window discourage a cardinal from attacking its image?" It might slow the shadowboxing of the bird fighting with what it considers a dastardly, would-be usurper if you put it on the outside.
"What are predators of bats?" Owls, hawks, snakes, raccoons, mink, weasels, opossums, cats and humans.
"Why do turkey vultures have bald heads?" Featherless heads are easy to keep clean. Vultures tuck their heads inside carcasses to feed and this adaptation keeps heads cleaner. The bare skin may play a role in thermoregulation.
Thanks for stopping by
"Everybody's talking about people breaking into houses but there are more people in the world who want to break out of houses." — Thornton Wilder,
"Don’t count the days; make the days count." – Muhammad Ali
"Out of difficulties grow miracles." — Jean de la Bruyere
Do good.
© Al Batt 2020
A yellow-bellied sapsucker. Photo by Al Batt
A Canada Goose with a toothache. Photo by Al Batt
My new lawn mower. Photo by Al Batt
Lemon tree very pretty. Photo by Al Batt
An early spring bouquet. Photo by Al Batt
austindailyherald.com April 29, 2020
Echoes from the Loafers’ Club Meeting
I have only one word for you.
What’s that?
Plethora.
Thanks. That means a lot.
Driving by Bruce’s drive
I have a wonderful neighbor, named Bruce. Whenever I pass his drive, thoughts occur to me, such as: Studies have found we touch our faces 16-23 times per hour on average. We play tag with ourselves. Gus and Julie Courrier of Emmons sent me a birthday card and useful gift — a single sheet of toilet paper. It wasn’t gold-plated, but it was thoughtful.
I love my jobs. The work required heaping amounts of travel. Not anymore. Life changes with bewildering speed. Lockdown has caused me to sleep better and more. There’s nothing like sleeping in my own bed. A Sleepopolis study (https://sleepopolis.com/sleep-cities/minnesota/) found Minnesotans working from home sleep an extra 15.7 hours per month. The research ranked Minnetrista as the best city for sleeping in Minnesota, while Bemidji came in last. Sleep is impacted by important behavioral, environmental, and lifestyle factors. Air pollution is a major factor. Clive was the best Iowa city for sleeping and Centerville the worst. An anonymous donor gave each household in Earlham, Iowa, gift cards worth $150 each (a $50 gift card each to a local restaurant, grocery store and coffee shop) to ease the burden of social distancing. I’ll bet the donor of more than $82,000 was a well-rested person from Clive.
I think Hadacol would make a good name for a baby. Its creator, Dudley LeBlanc of Louisiana who ran the company from 1945 to 1951, when asked the name’s origin, said, “Well, I hadda call it something.” Hadacol was everywhere — radio, billboards, newspapers, magazines, pharmacies and liquor stores. Ads for the wonder elixir weren’t necessarily fact-based. One was: “Two months ago I couldn’t read nor write. I took four bottles of Hadacol and now I’m teaching school.” Jerry Lee Lewis sang, “The Hadacol Boogie.” The patent medicine or snake oil was a mixture of vitamins B-1 and B-2, iron, calcium, niacin, honey, phosphorus and 12 percent alcohol. They left the mistakes in. It was advertised as a cure for: high blood pressure, ulcers, strokes, asthma, arthritis, diabetes, pneumonia, anemia, cancer, epilepsy, gallstones, heart trouble and hay fever. On the TV show “You Bet Your Life,” Groucho Marx asked LeBlanc what Hadacol was good for. LeBlanc quipped “It was good for $5 million for me last year.” It went bankrupt shortly after LeBlanc sold it. Maybe it wouldn’t make a good name.
The old joke department
A duck walked into a convenience store and asked the clerk, “Do you have any grapes?” The clerk said no and the duck left. The next day, the duck returned and asked, “Do you have any grapes?” The clerk again said no and the duck left. The following day, the duck waddled into the store and asked, “Do you have any grapes?” The clerk screamed at the duck, “You’ve come in here before asking for grapes. I told you each time, we don’t have any grapes! If you come back here again and ask for grapes, I’ll nail your feet to the floor!” The duck left, returned the next day and asked, “Do you have any nails?” The clerk replied, “No,” and the duck said, “Good. Do you have any grapes?”
I’ve been binge-reading and enjoyed
“The Sinking Of The Eastland: America’s Forgotten Tragedy” by Jay Bonansinga. A story about the sinking of the excursion boat Eastland on the Chicago River in 1915. There were 844 casualties. “A Hero Nonetheless: Albert Miller Lea, 1808-1891” by Robert M Merryman. The city and lake of Albert Lea were named after this Confederate Army major. “David and Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants” by Malcolm Gladwell. An examination of success, motivation and the role of adversity in shaping lives. “The Dog of the South” by Charles Portis. Portis was the author of “True Grit.” No cowboys in this one.
Nature notes
“I heard a professor in Wisconsin say golden eagles are much larger than bald eagles. Is that right?” The two are about the same size with the females being larger. Bald eagles are slightly longer on average than golden eagles. Their average weights are about the same, with the heaviest birds being balds. The wingspan of the two species are 6 to 7.5 feet. In a slightly related note, the Guinness Book of World Records lists the largest bald eagle nest on record as being found in St. Petersburg, Florida. It was 9.6 feet in diameter, 20 feet deep, and estimated to weigh 4,409 pounds.
Meeting adjourned
If you open your eyes and you’re still here, be happy. Be kind.
(C) Al Batt 2020
Blue-winged teal.
Echoes from the Loafers' Club Teleconference
My wife gave me a Fitbit.
How do you like it?
It's great. Now I know exactly how many steps it is from my bed to the sofa.
Driving by Bruce's drive
I have a wonderful neighbor, named Bruce. Whenever I pass his drive, thoughts occur to me, such as: I'd been trying to remember what day of the week it was, when in a bold move, I rose from a comfortable chair and tried to teach basic algebra to our cat. How teachers do their jobs, I don't know.
I have many Batt habits and some are bad. I'm trying not to touch anything I wouldn't lick. I'm wearing a baseball glove on one hand and a potholder on the other to keep me from touching my face.
In a world between hope and doubt people struggle to maintain a social distance from refrigerators. Before long, they're tanning by the light of an open refrigerator. Some wear masks at home to keep from eating so much. No one wants their old hula hoop to fit snugly.
A bowling ball named Jerry
I hadn't been bowling since they'd made the balls round and put holes in them, but I did on Leap Day. I thought I might not be able to bowl when I asked for size 14 bowling shoes. The clerk said, "You could just as well wear shoeboxes," but she found me a lovely set of clown shoes.
I had shoes. I needed a bowling ball. I chose a dark-colored one, so I could pick it out from the pins. The ball was named Jerry. At least that was the name etched into it. I was afraid I'd roll a no-hitter. I'd pitched them before — in softball.
I commenced bowling. I worried there might be math involved, but the scoring was done automatically. Disproving the old adage that lightning never strikes the same place twice, I threw three straight strikes. A turkey by a turkey. I rolled a 140 and retired.
Those thrilling days of yesteryear
Gary Hansen was a banker in Hartland. A fine man. One day, he was on a stepladder, washing the outside windows of the bank. Tom's Barber Shop was down the street and it was a rascal's lair. The denizens saw Gary, so they called the bank. Gary heard the ring. This was when people answered their phones, which were landlines only. All calls were important. Gary ran into the bank to answer the phone. They hung up before he could do that. One call should have been enough, but it wasn't.
Nature notes
I enjoy watching the spring bird shows. They change each day. Birds become more vocal, each having a story to tell. I love to hear the vesper sparrow sing the evening vespers, “Listen to my evening sing-ing-ing-ing.”
Male pheasants “crow” throughout the day all year, but especially at dawn and dusk in spring. Roosters also utter a series of loud, two-note calls when flushed.
Blue-winged teal are among the last ducks to return in the spring and leave early in the fall. The drakes defend mates, but not territories. Because of this, their nests are more concentrated than those of other ducks.
My yard entertained many common grackles. A heap of birds in one lump. They are common and widespread, but the North American Breeding Bird Survey shows a population decline of 58% from 1966 to 2014. Grackles dab natural insect repellents on their plumage. This includes ants, marigolds, lemon slices, walnut juice and chokecherries.
I spotted a couple of gray partridges in a field. Often called a Hungarian partridge, their North American Breeding Bird Survey populations declined by 60% from 1966–2015.
Red-tailed hawks were vigilant while perched on posts along roads not far from an old farm place where a wooden corn crib stood. The slatted walls encouraged the drying of ears of corn. Those gaps made such a crib a giant bird feeder. On the farm I grew up on, red-headed woodpeckers found those corn cribs to their liking.
I saw rock pigeons. These are the birds that people think of as barn pigeons or the street-smart birds seen in city parks. Pigeons are interesting and smart. Pigeons pass the mirror test. They realize that their mirrored images aren’t real birds. The beginning of Charles Darwin’s “The Origin of Species,” is more about pigeons than anything else. I watched a pair of pigeons kiss. The male grasped the female’s bill and regurgitated food as a courtship gesture. Sweet.
Meeting adjourned
There is someone who'd love to hear from you. Your call, text, e-mail or letter would be a blessing.
(C) Al Batt 2020
Fox Sparrow.
Echoes from the Loafers' Club Meeting
I was walking down a trail in Alaska when I met a grizzly bear. It stood up on its hind legs and went "Rowwwrrr!" I soiled myself.
I would have too.
No, I meant just now.
Driving by Bruce's drive
I have a wonderful neighbor, named Bruce. Whenever I pass his drive, thoughts occur to me, such as: Superstition says if you say "rabbit, rabbit" aloud upon arising on the first day of a month you'll have good luck all month. I often forget, but on the last April 1, I bellowed it for all the world to hear. On a totally unrelated note, my car is getting three weeks to the gallon. One of the many problems of living in unprecedented times is that I may not have appreciated the precedented times enough.
I've hunkered down lower and lower. I'm thankful I've managed to avoid watching marble racing. My wife had worn a mask and gloves to go grocery shopping. I wanted her to wear a HAZMAT suit. I'm a husband. I need affirmation and treats. And news. I asked her if she'd heard any tales from a foreign land (the grocery store). Before she could reply, the phone rang. Someone called to tell me that spring had sprung. That scared me. I hoped the weather wasn't listening. He asked what I was doing while on a short tether. I told him it's important to do something you love. He ended the call by thanking me for reminding him he'd love to take a nap.
Thoughts while trying to stay out of my own way
Few things match the thrill of getting the first mosquito bite of the season.
For many, tornado preparedness is bringing in the plastic deck chairs.
Hindsight is 20-20 unless it's my car's backup mirror, which occasionally has a dirty lens.
I remember staring at a framed display in school. It appeared to be showcasing how acupuncture had proven to be the wrong treatment choice for butterflies. I wonder who collected all those butterflies and what happened to them?
I miss
• Going into a restaurant and ordering an all-day breakfast, even though I wouldn't have the time to be there all day eating a breakfast.
• Trying to get kids outdoors by scattering iPhones all over the lawn.
• Traveling to places like Switzerland. It's a lovely place to visit and its flag is a big plus.
• Waving back at people who I thought were waving at me, but were waving at someone else and having to drop my waving hand as if it were a falling leaf.
I've learned
Roads covered in banana peels are slippery.
It doesn't help much to give a sermon while changing a flat. You'll be preaching to the tire.
Never to walk on a hotel treadmill while watching a track meet on TV.
Oatmeal cookies are often disguised as chocolate chip cookies.
Getting older is the adult thing to do.
When you're self-employed, you spend all day in staff meetings.
Standing on one leg on a bathroom scale isn't an effective diet, but I'll keep trying it.
Marriage teaches you how to have a long argument using nothing but your eyes.
Nature notes
Red-winged blackbirds are the sounds of spring. Rooster pheasants crowed. Canada geese claimed nest sites. That’s a noisy job. Turkey vultures tilted through the sky. The poet Mary Oliver wrote, “Like large dark lazy butterflies they sweep over the glades looking for death, to eat it, to make it vanish, to make of it the miracle: resurrection.”
Tundra swan flocks, eastern bluebirds and brown-headed cowbirds suddenly appeared whenever a birder was near. Cowbirds are brood parasites. They don’t build nests. Instead, they lay their eggs in the nests of other birds. The host birds incubate cowbird eggs and raise the chicks, often to the detriment of their own offspring. Sandhill cranes rattled, trumpeted and bugled as they took flight. Opportunistic omnivores, their varied diet includes waste corn, small mammals, amphibians, insects, reptiles and snails. Northern harriers return when the snow leaves the fields. Once called a marsh hawk, it courses low over the ground while hunting small mammals, reptiles, amphibians, birds and insects. They locate some prey by sound.
Pocket gopher mounds declare the frost is out of the ground. I thought of the garden. I used to plant marigolds around the borders of vegetable gardens to discourage rabbits. I stopped when the eastern cottontails began eating marigolds.
Meeting adjourned
"Kind words, kind looks, kind acts, and warm handshakes — these are means of grace when men in trouble are fighting their unseen battles." — John Hall. Make them air handshakes.
(C) AL BATT 2020
by Al Batt, austindailyherald.com
April 22, 2020 12:01 PM
Echoes from the Loafers’ Club Meeting
Could I borrow $495?
I loaned you $500 last week.
I know, but I’m doing much better now.
Driving by Bruce’s drive
I have a wonderful neighbor, named Bruce. Whenever I pass his drive, thoughts occur to me, such as: It’s April. That means spring has had time to hide. More snow! Is that what we pay taxes for? Weather can be a joke nobody gets.
Time moves fast and time moves slow. Days bunch together. I’m learning to pace myself. Life is good — I’m not living on sardines and lima beans. The clinic sends me helpful emails to remind me that if I sneeze into an elbow, it should be my elbow, not the elbow of a loved one or a stranger. I hope the Toilet Paper Fairy has visited you. Homes need more of the stuff because more games are being played on the home field, so to speak, than before. My neighbor Crandall called to tell me that he hadn’t taken a shower in nearly two weeks, but his hands have never been cleaner. He’s eating in a new restaurant called his kitchen. He hoped there would be a baseball season this year. It’s doubtful due to the chronic spitting involved.
Remember the good old days of a couple months ago? Boy, those were the days. I miss walking into a restaurant and being asked, “Table or booth?” It was a choice between a chair or a sofa. I generally opted for the tush cushion. I have no isolation blues, but I haven’t had much practice being secluded. My parents never grounded me. Why would they want to subject themselves to the presence of a surly teenager any more than they had to? I was the baby of the family, so they’d already given up on having a perfect child.
I grew up being admonished for any indication of sloth. Idle hands are the devil’s workshop. I heard that often. It wasn’t from the Bible, but sounded as if it should be. Maybe that’s why I don’t idle well.
The mail brought a package from a Nebraska reader. It contained an MIA bracelet bearing the name of Sgt. Michael Batt who died on March 16, 1969 in Vietnam. He died on my birthday. I had two cousins killed there. I suspect Michael, an Ohioan, was what my family refers to as a shirttail relative – a distant one. His death saddens me.
The joke department
A caller asked, “What is red and smells like blue paint?” I didn’t know the answer. “Red paint.”
Another called to ask what you get when you cross a pitbull with a rabbit. I got that one. A pitbull.
In local news
Podiatrist charges by the foot.
Man insulates his house with drugstore receipts.
The lines at the Molasses Museum move slowly.
Nature notes
Bruce Armstrong of Hartland asked how robins find worms. Sight is the key sense. Dr. Frank Heppner, an ornithologist, used sensitive equipment to record the low-frequency sounds made by burrowing earthworms. He found that robins ignored those sounds. Years later, two Canadian scientists published conflicting findings. They discovered robins couldn’t find buried mealworms if their hearing was compromised. Hearing might work in concert with vision — or not.
Barb Bruns of Mankato asked why a robin was flinging itself at a window. The bird might be employed by a window cleaning company, hired to drum up business by soiling glass. Hey, a bird has to put food on the table. OK, the bird doesn’t have a table. All the more reason he needed a job. But it’s likely doing what birds of many species do. When a pair decides on a nest site, a surrounding area becomes their territory and they aggressively protect it by driving away other birds of their species. When a male robin spots another male, a chasing fight ensues. The dominant male gets a mate, the nesting location, the territory and the area’s food. When a territorial bird, sees its image in a window’s reflective surface, it perceives its mirrored image as a rival and tries to drive the other bird away. A real robin would leave, but the reflection remains. Being persistent and stubborn, the robin continues to attack. If you want the robin to stop, block the image. Put a piece of cardboard or plastic cling on the outside of the window where the bird is attacking. Soaping the window works. This may cause Martha Stewart to shudder, but, in most cases, you’ll need it only until the shadowboxing robin thinks its worthy adversary has departed.
Meeting adjourned
Spread the love one kind word at a time.
(C) Al Batt 2020
It’s not easy being a harbinger of spring. Photo by Al Batt
Not hot molten lava, but cool molting goldfinch.
I found my squill on Blueberry Hill.
I've been watching yellow-bellied sapsuckers maniacally machine gunning sap wells into trees. The work of those industrious birds has been followed closely by yellow-rumped warblers, diminutive ruby-crowned kinglets and both downy and hairy woodpeckers who gladly plundered the avian soda fountains.
The White-throated Sparrow whistles while the snow melts.
The fox sparrows are singing a storm away.
The snow doves are blooming.
Does the Song Sparrow sing "Maids maids-maids-put-on-your tea-kettle-ettle-ettle”; “Hip, hip,hip hurrah boys, spring is here,” or “Madge, Madge, Madge pick beetles off, the water’s hot"?
A goldfinch changing color in the snow.
Starlings need love too.
The little singing that was being done by the Fox Sparrows was stifled by the snow.
Naturally
It was a lovely day. I hoped everyone recognized it as such. I walked amongst the trees while trying not to think of Leif Erickson, Branch Rickey, Twiggy or barking my shins. Folklore says as it rains in March it rains in June.
A song sparrow often has a dark spot in the center of a streaked breast and dark feathers resembling mutton chops under its bill. Song sparrows are persistent singers throughout spring and summer. I try never to let their song go to voicemail. Its scientific name Melodia means “melody” in Greek.
A northern flicker, an avian anteater, fed on the ground. I heard the rattling gu-rrroo calls of sandhill cranes flying high in the sky. A pair of American kestrels flew overhead on bent wings with swept back tips as they exchanged excited “killy” notes. These handsome falcons nest in cavities and likely nest in every county in Minnesota. It resembles a mourning dove when perched on a utility wire.
Paul Peters of Ceylon reported many wood ducks this year. The Wood Duck Society says wood ducks return as soon as ice melt occurs, with egg-laying beginning shortly thereafter, with an initial egg-laying peak in early to mid-April. In southern Minnesota, small sloughs often open up toward the end of March. Wood duck hens in the north have only one brood per season. If an initial clutch of eggs is destroyed, they often nest again. Nearly all cavity nests have been started by late May to early June. In Minnesota, only an occasional hatch occurs as late as August.
I attended a NABS (North American Bluebird Society) and BAN (Bluebirds Across Nebraska) Conference in Kearney right before COVID-19 hit. Bluebirders let their passion shine through. There were folks from 23 states and two provinces there. John Muir’s editor, Robert Underwood Johnson, repeatedly encouraged Muir to reduce his use of the words ‘beautiful’ and ‘glorious’ in his writings. The rosy glow of the sun highlighted sandhill cranes on the Platte River. The birds appeared to be a simple, but elegant string of pearls. Their voices evoked mysteries. Muir would have called them beautiful and glorious.
Q&A
“Why do birds stand on one leg?” They do that when standing on a bathroom scale. We’ve all tried that. They also do it to minimize energy loss.
Mark Sorenson of Hollandale asked why a pair of bald eagles builds a second nest. There could be a number of reasons: A mate is lost, the site is disturbed, nest failure, or damaged nest tree.
“You wrote you’d seen a scissor-tailed flycatcher in Minnesota. What does that bird eat?” They eat scissor-tailed flies, of course. That’s a fib. They eat insects, particularly grasshoppers, crickets and beetles, and occasionally fruit. The migratory bird breeds from northeastern Mexico north through New Mexico, Texas, Oklahoma, Colorado, Kansas, Missouri, Arkansas, and Louisiana. It’s the state bird of Oklahoma. The last one I saw in Minnesota was in 2017.
I’ve been reading
In the February issue of “Birding,” a publication of the American Birding Association there was a story by Mel Goff of Colorado who wrote of his quest to see every state bird: “Anyhow, there were reports of loon sightings at State Line Lake in Emmons, a small town on the Minnesota-Iowa border. We drove through a lot of rain along the way, but the morning of May 22, 2018, offered sunshine, warm temperatures, and a migration fallout at Gateway Park in Emmons. In our morning at the park, we recorded over 60 species. The trees and shrubs on the park held more than a dozen warbler species, including a beautiful Connecticut Warbler, a life bird for us. And in the aftermath of that rare warbler, an afterthought: a Common Loon on the lake.”
The same issue featured a friend, whose introduction was: “Carrol Henderson richly deserves his reputation as a bird’s best friend. during a 45-year career with the Minnesota Department of Natural Resources, he helped bring back Trumpeter Swans and Peregrine Falcons, helped create the Pine-to-Prairie International Birding Trail in Minnesota and Manitoba, pioneered studies of lead poisoning in Bald Eagles, and worked to restore Common Loon and American White Pelican populations lost from the Deepwater Horizon oil spill in 2010.”
Thanks for stopping by
“And time remembered is grief forgotten, And frosts are slain and flowers begotten, And in green underwood and cover, Blossom by blossom the spring begins.” — Algernon Charles Swinburne
“We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms — to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” — Viktor Frankl
Do good.
(C) Al Batt 2020
The red-winged blackbird's scientific name is agelaius phoeniceus, meaning "belonging to a flock" and "deep red." - Al Batt/Albert Lea Tribune